原作者：
来源5 Things Men Want to Hear - Discover What To Hear From Women
译者北京这头猫
So what do men want to hear? The things that women need to know most when it comes to male psychology is what men really want to hear, what it is they want women to say that will make them even more attracted, and how to inject humour into a relationship and spice things up so it doesn’t stale or fizzle out. My usual response when asked “what can I say to a guy to make him like me?” is that there are much deeper issues that need to be addressed before you can think about the small talk; however, there are few things that make men feel much more attraction towards you on a short-term basis. Below are my top 5 things that a man wants to hear when you’re dating or in a relationship... so use them and play around with them. 1. “That was amazing” Just having sex with you isn’t enough for a man; if you want to keep him you must make him feel sexually validated. And the best way to do this is by letting him know that he completely satisfies you sexually. A man wants to hear from what you say that he is everything you need in the bedroom and more. Men’s self-esteem is very highly wrapped up in their sexual ability, so if he doesn’t receive any praise or recognition in this area, then he’s going to get insecure and start to feel less close to you. There is an important principle here that applies across the board in relationships, which is this: You must praise him when he does things well! So often we take our loved ones for granted and only express our feelings towards them when they do something wrong. But, if you compliment him when he does something well, he’s going to want to please you more. 2. “I really need you…” Ok, first things first, this isn’t about being needy. It’s about making a man feel needed. One crucial thing men crave in relationships is to feel like a man. Aggressive women often make the mistake of acting so independent that the men they date eventually become emasculated, simply because they don’t feel like there is anything they are really needed for. But don’t get me wrong – There is absolutely nothing wrong with independence in itself (a man will be attracted to women with their own life) – But if you never ask for his help with anything, or if you keep talking about how you don’t need a man in your life for anything, he is going to feel completely turned off and emasculated. It can be as small as him fixing a problem around the house and you saying: “I love that you’re able to take care of things” or if you need a hand getting something done, say, “I really need your help with this”. See, it doesn’t matter if a man isn’t the financial breadwinner in a relationship, as long as he feels like he takes care of your needs in other ways. 3. ”I believe in you” Every man needs to know that the woman he is with absolutely, 100% believes that he can do anything he sets his mind to. Even if he doesn’t really believe it himself, one of the most attractive things for a man is just the security of knowing that his girlfriend/wife believes he is the greatest man in the world. When he’s feeling under pressure or struggling if you say something like “Well, if anyone can do it, you can” he is going to feel so attracted to you in that moment. He wants you to be his biggest and proudest supporter. 4. “You look so sexy in that shirt” Just because you are in a relationship, doesn’t mean a man grows tired of hearing how physically attracted you are to him; in fact it becomes even more important. It can just be in the form of a text telling him how much you can’t wait to be in bed with him tonight, or by telling him how sexy you find him with his shirt off. These are small touches, but they let a man know that you can’t resist him, which is what really turns him on. 5. And finally... He wants to hear you take an interest in his passions. Men will love it if you really listen and ask about the things that make them passionate. It might be his career, a particular hobby, or some other interest that is important to him. But don’t just ask random questions like an interviewer; really let him talk about it and show an active interest if it’s something that he considers a big part of his life. This is going to make him feel much closer to you, as he is sharing something important to him with someone he loves.
那么男人想听什么呢?
当涉及男性心理时，女人最需要知道的是,男人真正想听什么，他们想让女人讲的话语甚至能更吸引他们，还有如何在恋爱中注入幽默和增添情趣，以便恋情不会令人厌倦或结束。
当我被问到,“我该对一个男人说些什么，才能让他喜欢我呢？”这种问题时，通常的反应是，在你想闲聊之前，还有更深的议题需要强调；然而，在短期基础上，有几点能令你更吸引男人。
以下是我列出的前5种男人在约会或恋爱中想听到的话…… 所以用这些与他们过过招儿吧。
1.“太爽啦！”
仅仅和你发生性行为对一个男人来说还不够；如果你想留住他，就必须让他感到自己的性能力得到了肯定。最好的方式是让他知道他能完全满足你。
男人想听你说他就是你想要的一切，无论是在卧室里，还是在其他地方。男人的自尊与性能力高度关联，所以如果他在这方面得不到赞美或认可，那么他就会感到不安，开始感觉跟你没那么亲密了。
有条适用于恋爱关系的重要准则就是：当他表现得好时你要称赞他！我们常常拿爱人表现得好看成是理所当然，只在他们做错事时才对他们表达感受。但是，如果他干得好时你称赞他，他会想再多干点儿来取悦你。
2.“我真的需要你……”
好，要是先行，这并不是在说情感匮乏。而是说要让一个男人感到被需要。
关键一点是，男人渴望在恋爱中感到自己像个男人。强势的女人经常犯的错误是，她们表现得太过独立了，以致使约会的对象最终变得很颓，理由很简单，因为他们觉得没什么事真的需要他们做。
但不要误会我,女人独立绝对没有错（男人会被有自己生活的女人吸引）- 但如果无论什么事你都从不找他帮忙，或是如果你总说无论什么事你都不需要男人帮忙的话，他肯定会熄火变颓的。
事情可以小到比如他搞定房子里的一个故障，然后你说：“我喜欢你搞定事情的样子”或是如果你在做什么事时需要帮手，就说，“我真的需要你帮我干这个”。
看到了，如果一个男人不能养家糊口也没关系，只要他感到能用其他方式满足你的需要就行。
3.“我信任你”
每个男人都需要知道，跟他在一起的女人是绝对的，百分之百的相信他，相信他能完成所有他下定决心的事。甚至他自己都不太相信自己能干的事，对一个男人来说，最有吸引力的事情之一仅仅是一种安全感，一种知道他的女友/老婆相信他是世界上最棒的男人的感觉。
当他感到有压力或是内心很纠结时，如果你来一句类似“嗯，如果别人行，你一定行！”的话，那个时刻，他一定感觉你非常吸引他。
他想让你成为他最大，最自豪的支持者。
4.“你穿那件衬衫看起来可真性感”
就因为你们在恋爱，并不意味一个男人会逐渐厌倦听你说他的身体有多吸引你的话；事实上，这甚至变得更重要了。
可以只留张字条告诉他，今晚你有多迫不及待地想跟他上床，或是告诉他，你发现他脱衬衫时有多性感。这些都是小触碰，但可以让一个男人知道你不会抗拒他，这样能真正点燃他。
5. 最后……他想听到你对他的热情所在感兴趣。
男人会非常喜欢，如果你真的在听并问起令他们热情高涨的事物。也许是他的事业、一种特别的爱好,或是其他一些对他很重要的兴趣。
但是，别像个面试官似地问些随机的问题；真正让他谈谈，如果他认为这是他生活中的一大部分，你就显示出积极的兴趣。这会让他感到与你更亲近，就像他正在和爱人分享对他重要的事物似地。
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