几招让你轻松做父母

译者 yuanmonica11

I often get asked how I can do so much while having six kids.

人们经常问我：你有六个孩子要照顾，怎么还能做那么多事？

我的回答很简短--因为我老婆伊娃很棒！你知道这些就足够了。没有她，我连一半的事都做不了。

She is the reason Zen Habits is able to exist. And so if you want parenting advice, you’d be smart to ask her.

因为她，禅的习惯（Zen Habits)这个网站才得以存在。所以如果你想获得一些育儿建议，你应该问伊娃。

She doesn’t, however, have a blog. And so I’ll share some things that we both do that make our jobs as parents easier.

她没有博客，所以我就跟大家分享一些我们的经验，让大家的都能轻松做父母。

These are Very Important Rules that must never be broken by any Serious Parent … until, of course, you want to break them. The first rule of Rules of Effortless Parenting is that you should always break rules.

这些都是尽职的父母不会打破的“金规玉律”，除非你不得不破规矩。而第一条规矩就是“打破规矩“。

Rules of Effortless Parenting

”轻松做父母之法则“

There is really only one rule: Love Them. But you already knew that one, so let’s get into details:

其实只有一条：爱他们。但是你一定已经知道这条了，那么我们细说一下。

1. Teach kids to be self-sufficient. Our kids started by learning how to pick up after themselves (as 1 and 2 year olds), and later learned how to feed themselves breakfast, brush their teeth and shower and dress themselves, wash dishes and clean up in the kitchen, clean their rooms, do laundry, etc. Our jobs as parents became tons easier, but it does take a little patient teaching in the beginning of each skill.

1. 让孩子学会自己动手。我们的孩子在一两岁的时候开始学习摔倒后爬起来，然后学会自己吃饭、自己刷牙、洗澡、穿衣服、洗碗、清理厨房、打扫房间、洗衣服等等技能。他们学会这些，我们这些父母就轻松多了。但是开始教他们的时候还是要费点工夫的。

2. Teach older kids to help with the younger kids. If you have multiple kids, this rule is golden. Our teens can help the little kids with anything. That makes our jobs a lot easier, and the older kids learn responsibility.

2. 教会大孩子照顾弟弟妹妹。如果你有好几个孩子，那这条便尤为重要。十几岁的孩子能帮弟弟妹妹做任何事。这不但能减轻我们的负担，还能培养大孩子的责任感。

3. Teach them to solve problems. This is really the main job of unschooling, which is the philosophy we follow as homeschoolers. Our kids don’t learn facts or even skills. They learn to solve problems on their own. If they know how to do this, they can learn any facts or skills they need to solve their problems. Want to learn how to write a computer program? That’s just another problem that you need to learn how to solve. Want to cook Thai food, or write a blog, or start a business, or build something? Problems that you can solve.

3.教会他们解决问题。这不是学校能教会的事情，而是我们家长必须懂得的道理。孩子不用去学知识或者技能。只要培养起独立解决问题的能力，他们就具备了解决问题的知识和技能。想学会编写一个电脑程序吗？这就是你要学会解决的一个问题。想学做泰国料理，写博客，创业或是盖房子？这些问题你都能解决。

4. Show them how to be passionate. The other main thing you teach unschoolers, besides solving their own problems, is how to be passionate about something. If they know this, they will do work they’re passionate about as adults. How do you teach them this? By modeling it yourself. By doing projects with them where you’re passionate about something. Kids learn an amazing amount by watching and mimicking.

4. 让他们感受你的热情。另一件你要在家教会孩子的就是让他们对一件事情抱有浓厚的兴趣。如果他们学会了，他们就会像成年人一样做自己热衷的事情。那么该如何教他们呢？那就是以身作则。和他们一起做你热衷的事情。通过观察和模仿，孩子们能够学到很多。

5. Play with them outside, and be active. Spending time with your kids is one of the best ways to show them you love them. Playing with them is one of the best ways to spend time with them. Playing outside shows them how to be active and have fun being active. I also stay active on my own, but I make sure they know what I’m doing, why, and how much fun it is. They have a role model who is healthy and fit, and that will help them for the rest of their lives.

5.主动和他们进行室外活动。抽出时间陪孩子最能表现你对他们的爱。与孩子玩耍是最好的方式之一。参加室外活动可以让他们变得活跃，体会到其中的乐趣。我会一直表现得活跃，而且我会让他们知道我在干什么，为什么会那么高兴，乐趣何在。如果身边有这样一个健康、阳光的榜样，那么他们会在以后的人生中也向着这个方向发展。

6. Don’t overschedule. Most parents schedule too many classes, sports, parties, activities. We give our kids lots of unstructured, unscheduled time. They have to figure out what to do with that time. That’s an important skill to learn. It also means their lives are less stressed out, as are ours, and they learn a slower pace of life.

6.不要给孩子安排太多事。大部分家长都给孩子安排很多课程、体育活动、派对和其他活动。而我们给孩子很多自由的时间。他们自己决定如何利用这些时间。这是个很重要的技能。这也意味着他们的生活没有太大压力，就像他们的父母一样，学会一种慢节奏的生活。

7. Don’t dote. I’ve seen lots of parents that dote on everything their kids do, who are worried about every little thing their kid might touch or that might cause a fall. Back off, and give them some space. They need attention, but they also need some time alone to explore, to fall and get back up, to scrape their knees, to figure stuff out on their own. Go do something on your own, and leave your kids alone sometimes.

7. 不要溺爱。我见过很多父母对孩子做的每一件事都十分在意，很关注他们会摸到什么，担心孩子会跌倒。你不如退后一步，给他们一些空间。虽然孩子需要家长的关注，但他们也要有独立的空间去探索周围的环境，摔破膝盖然后爬起来，自己去寻找原因。你完全可以去做你自己的事情，让孩子自己呆一会儿。

8. Dance. Because life without dance is dull and not worth living. Play loud music. Go crazy.

8. 跳舞。因为没有舞蹈的生活太无聊，没意思。把音乐声音开大，跳起来吧！

9. Read with them, and read in front of them. Kids love books, especially if you read them with them. Here are some of my favorites. If you are a reader yourself, and they see that, this will teach them to love reading too. Reading is one of the best loves you can instill in kids.

9. 和他们一起看书，还要在他们面前看。孩子喜欢看书，特别和你一起看。这是我最喜欢的活动。如果你自己爱看书，你会让孩子也变成爱书人。阅读是你能灌输给孩子最好的爱好之一。

10. Be inquisitive. Ask questions about everything, and encourage them to do the same. Kids are naturally inquisitive … they can ask a million questions, because everything is new to them. Learn to see the world through their eyes — it’s amazing. Why the hell IS the sky blue? Why do leaves change color? How does a bird fly? These are brilliant questions, and you should explore them with the kids — don’t just give them answers, but show them how to find out.

10. 保持好奇心。问一切可能的问题，鼓励他们也这么做。孩子天生好奇，他们能问出一百万个问题，因为一切对于他们都是新的。学会从他们的眼中看世界，这会是个奇妙的经验。为什么地狱的颜色是蓝的？为什么叶子会变颜色？鸟是怎么飞起来的？这些都是好问题，你要和孩子一起发掘答案。不要直接告诉他们，让他们学会自己找答案。