男人是上帝给女人的礼物么？不，阴蒂才是。

译者 解君

By The MamaSutra • Jul 27th, 2011 • Category: Blog, Good Vibrations Sexy Mama

Source: magazine.goodvibes.com

文章来源：http://magazine.goodvibes.com/

A hilarious Map of the Clitoris.

一张有趣的阴蒂图

Does anyone else find it odd that there is little or no discussion of the role of the clitoris in sex education in general? Does anyone (besides my sex educator friends and colleagues) know the extended physiology of the clitoral structure? See pic at right.

       是否还有别人注意到一个奇怪的现象，通常在性教育中，人们几乎很少讨论阴蒂的作用；是否还有别人（除了我周围从事性教育工作的朋友和同事们）知道阴蒂的其他的生理机能？参看右边的图。

This vast structure is just under the surface of the vulva.

外阴表面展开还有这样的结构

Why is this? Do you know how utterly amazing the clitoris is? There certainly is plenty of info on the penis. And most teen boys know how it works from their own “hands-on” experience. Many teen girls don’t often have that luxury of self-knowledge and awareness that the boys do.

       这是为什么呢？大家知道阴蒂多么令人称奇么？没错，有很有关于阴茎的知识。而且几乎所有青年男孩通过“自慰”了解了阴茎是怎样工作的。而像男子了解他们的身体一样，女孩子想要知道自己的身体，就是件奢侈的事儿了。  

One of my favorite authors Susie Bright wrote a book called Mommy’s Little Girl: On Sex, Motherhood, Porn And Cherry Pie. In it she wrote,

       我最喜欢的作家之一Susie Bright写了一本名叫“妈妈的小姑娘：关于性，母性，情色和初夜”。书中写道：

The girls know that boys urinate through their penis–and also when they are older, are able to have “have sex” with the same piece of equipment, but what do girls “have sex” with? Most girls don’t know. They know that boys get off with these penises of theirs; but they’re not sure whether they have something that would make them feel the same way [… ] These girls are smart and inquisitive. […] but they are also deliberately kept ignorant of their intrinsic female anatomy- to the point of not even knowing the names of anything below the waist.  

      “女孩儿们知道男孩子用阴茎排尿-也知道当男孩儿长大后，通过阴茎“性交”，但是女孩儿用什么性交呢？几乎所有女孩都不知道。她们知道男孩子通过阴茎得到快感，但是不确定自己是否也有什么东西能让她们感到同样的快乐...,会这么想的女孩是聪明又好奇的...，但是她们却故意选择了不去了解她们的本质结构，甚至不知道任何她们‘下面'结构的名字。” 

So in those first sexual heterosexual experiences, even if both of them are virgins, the male often knows part of what is “supposed” to happen in those first encounters because he knows how his plumbing works. The female? Not so much. Plus, most of the education these kids get is information from porn and/or peers with bravado. Add to that, abstinence only before marriage sex education surely isn’t telling them what to do or how to protect themselves “because abstinence is the absolute safest way to avoid STIs and pregnancy”. Safest yes, but not realistic. If females aren’t aware that things are supposed to feel good, chances are they will engage in this behavior because others want it, not because they understand what is happening. Ask a girl whose had sex for the first time about the experience and often she will tell you how she looked, not how she felt. What is wrong with this?!?  

       所以在第一次性交时的情侣，即使两个人都是处子，因为男性知道阴茎是怎样工作的，所以知道一些将要发生的事情，而知道的女性却不多。还有，孩子们接受的性知识大多是从情色片或者是一些有过性行为的孩子那里听来的。提到这不得不说，‘婚前一定不能发生性行为’，这样的教育，没能告诉孩子们怎么去保护自己。“因为禁欲是避免性病传染和怀孕最好的办法”，没错是最安全的，但却不现实。如果女性不知道性爱其实很美好，也不知道性行为的含义，而只是因为男性想发生性行为，她做了就可能导致性病和怀孕。问一个初试性爱的女孩感觉怎么样啊，她会告诉你她是怎么看待这件事，而不是她有什么感觉。到底是出了什么问题？

So many people I talk to who work with tweens and teens between the ages 9-14, tell me stories that break my heart. Especially the stories of how girls are unaware of how sex relates to them. As pointed out above, these young girls know some of the reproductive biology of sex, you know, the mechanics – that a man ejaculates and to some of them that equals “sex”. But what is the woman’s sexual response cycle, what is the function of the clitoris and its role in sex? Without this info everything young women learn about sex happens outside of them and their bodies and that it’s something women do for someone else, mostly because they have not yet learned or been told that it’s about Pleasure. gasp!  In a recent blog, Gender Studies Professor Hugo Schwyzer wrote:

When we tell girls that sex is something people do when they love each other, it sets them up to believe that sex is sacrificial. So when Jassie falls in love with Bobby, and Bobby pushes for intercourse, she’s conditioned to focus on “giving it up” for him rather than on thinking about what feels good for her. The more she’s taught that her pleasure matters, the less likely she’ll be coerced into going farther than her body is ready to go. “It’s supposed to feel good,” she may remember, “and right now, being rushed and pawed doesn’t feel good. So I want to stop.” Centering pleasure gives young women a power that centering love doesn’t.

      “当我们告诉女孩儿，性是相爱的人在一起做的事，这却让她们认为性会牺牲贞洁。所以当Jassie爱上Bobby的时候，并且Bobby提出要交往，她习惯性想到的是要拒绝他而不是想想什么会给她带来快乐，越告诉她快乐很重要，她就越不愿意继续下去，强迫自己去违背身体的意愿。她很不舍的说：“应该是很美好的事，但是现在，我心里矛盾混乱，所以就到此为止吧。”快乐给了少女力量，而投入真爱她却不敢了。”

There are plenty of stories (urban myth/moral panic?) about young teens and Rainbow Parties — No wonder some of these teen girls have claimed their sexual “power” by giving blow jobs to their male peers, but honestly! What. Do. These. Girls. Get. Out. Of. It?? I’m less shocked by their performing oral sex and more shocked by the fact that I’m not so sure they are aware of the reasons for their behavior or in touch with how they feel about what they are doing.  

       有很多关于青少年和性派对的故事（都市传奇/道德恐慌？）-难怪故事中的一些女孩通过给男友口交体现她们的性能力！怎样才能让这些女孩儿摆脱这种局面呢？她们口交使我震惊，但是令我更加震惊的是这样一个事实：她们是否知道口交的原因和体会自己的感受。

Let me ask you this: Do you know that the sole function of the female clitoris is for pleasure? Read that again. The sole function of the female clitoris is for pleasure. It is the only part of either body, male or female, that has that honorable distinction. Please take note: God loves us women enough to give us this amazing clitoris that has NO other function than for pleasure! Women must teach other adult women and young women that there is supposed to be a connection between the arousal they sense in their minds and the physical response they feel between their legs. Many times this mind-body connection has been severed through shaming, religious abuse, or guilt. There is no need for that anymore. More and more women are standing up and asking for what they want in their sexual relationships. And the clitoris deserves some attention. We owe it to the young women who will come after us (pun intended?).  

       请让我提一个问题：你知道女性阴蒂的唯一作用就是带来快么？请再看一遍我的问题。女性阴蒂的唯一作用就是带来快乐。无论男女，人人拥有这样一个器官，它至高无上。请牢记：上帝爱我们女人，所以赋予我们神奇的阴蒂，它只有一个作用，就是给我们带来快乐！我们应该向其他成年女性和女孩儿传递这样的讯息：精神的快感和阴蒂的反应有关系。很多时候，这种快感和身体的关系，由于羞耻感，宗教迫害，或是被认为是罪行而被摒弃。再也不必这样了，越来越多的女性走向独立并争取她们在两性关系中的需要。所以要关注阴蒂，我们的关注也是为了其他年轻女性。