征服人生--生活不必如此痛苦

译者 狂暴的猩猩

Is life slapping you in the face every time you turn around? Don’t stand there and turn the other cheek.

是否当你每次转身时生活都会当面打击你？不要只是站在那儿也不反抗。

You don’t have to be miserable forever. You can change your life and have an awesome one.

你不会永远都是那样悲惨。你可以改变你的人生使其成为了不起的经历。

You can have a life in which you smile every morning and feel excitement to start the new day. You can have happiness and fun. No longer fearing what aggravation will wait for you.

你能够拥有这样的人生，每天早上你都会微笑并为新的一天开始而激动。你可以拥有快乐和乐趣。而不必害怕有什么糟糕的事情在等着你。

Instead of flying off the handle every time something bad happens, you could take it all in stride. Imagine – sighing, picking up the pieces, putting things back in order and move on as if nothing happened. How good does that sound?

在糟糕的事情发生后，不必每一次都停下来处理它，你可以大步前进将其抛在脑后。想象一下，叹息、收拾残局、整理好一切以及继续就好像什么都没有发生过一样。听起来如何？

If you’re sick of living life as a human punching bag, make some positive changes that will last a lifetime. You could finally be one of those people you hate to be around, the ones that seem to be happy all the time.

如果你厌倦了将生活作为一个人的出气筒，那么做出一些积极的改变，（而这改变）将会持续一生。最终你会成为那些你曾经嫉妒的、整天看起来都很快乐的那类人。

How is that they are always like that, anyway? You’re about to find out a few of their secrets.

那么，他们到底是怎样才会整天都很快乐呢？你即将发现一些他们的秘密。

Attack, Squash and Move On

进攻、打击和继续前进

Bad things happen to everyone. No one is immune to that. The differences between people who are happy and miserable people are that happy ones know what to do when something bad happens.

坏事人人都会遇到。没人免得了。快乐的人和痛苦的人之间的区别在于糟糕的事情发生后快乐的人知道该怎么做。

They attack it, like a vulture on prey. As soon as something look like it’s about to go awry they are on top of it to squash it.

他们会采取进攻，就像秃鹰捕食猎物一样。一旦事情看起来将要出错时，他们就会占据上方进行打击。

If they aren’t able to stop the crisis from happening, they do everything in their power to control every part of it until it’s resolved.  They take it over and do whatever they have to do to resolve it. Once it’s resolved, they take a deep breath, relax and move on with a smile.

如果他们不能阻止即将到来的危机，他们会竭尽所能去控制危机的每一部分直到问题解决。他们掌控危机并解决危机做任何力所能及的努力。一旦危机得到解决，他们会深呼吸、放松然后带着微笑前进。

So what does it feel like after an accomplishment like that? Image yourself conquering a crisis with control and strength. Now you know can take on anything life wants to throw your way. You are ready.

那么像那样完成了一项成就后感觉会是如何呢？想象一下当你通过控制和能力征服了一次危机。现在你知道当遭遇人生意外该如何应对了。你能解决。

Remove the Problem Source

解决问题的源头

Does life keep slapping you in the face from the same direction? In other words, is there someone or something that’s causing you problems?

生活是否会始终从同一方面来打击你吗？换句话说，是什么人或什么事引发了你的问题？

Find the origin of your problems to either fix it or eliminate it. If it’s a relationship, you might have to talk to the person about her behavior or make changes to your environment.

找到问题的来源，然后解决它或去除它。如果是人际关系的问题，你可能需要同某人谈谈她的行为或针对你的环境做出一些改变。

The point of this life change is to identify the source of why you are miserable and make a change instead of just living with it. Remember, don’t subject yourself to living like this – make a change.

这项生活改变的关键在于辨别什么导致你成为痛苦的人并为之做出改变而不是继续这样生活。牢记，不要使自己屈服于这样的生活--做出改变。

Change Yourself When You Can’t Change Others

不能改变他人时请改变自己

So you can’t always change other people or the world around you, so in this case, you’ll have to change the way you react. The good news is that many times, people will change the way they act when you change the way you react.

你无法总是改变身边的人或环境，因此在这样的情况下，你得改变你反应的方式。好消息是很多时候，人们总是随着你对他们反应的改变而改变。

Follow these steps to change your reaction to your world:

按照以下步骤改变你对你周边的反应：

When someone makes you upset, express that the topic of conversation upsets you, offer to change the topic, and if that doesn’t work, end the conversation.

1.当有人使你情绪低落时，解释这种交流的主题使你情绪不佳，试着改变谈话的主题，如果不起作用的话，结束这次交流吧。

Guests with boundary issues should be confronted with an expression of your needs such as, “I need time to get ready for your arrival.” with a follow up request such as, “Will you please call me a day or two ahead of time next time?”

2.客人拜访的时限问题最好就你的需要事先进行沟通，例如：“我需要时间为你的到来做准备。”然后可随之提出如以下的请求：“下次你能否提前一两天打电话通知我一下？”

Do not feed people who insult you with comebacks or satisfy them with your discontent. Instead, smile and express your self-approval and love by saying nothing or saying, “I am sorry but I disagree with your opinion.”

3.不要对辱骂你的人进行同样的反击或让你的不满使他们高兴。取而代之的是，微笑，并通过沉默或说“抱歉，但我不同意你的看法”来表达你的自我肯定和爱心。

Stop pleasing others and start pleasing yourself. You can’t make everyone happy all of the time. So stop trying because all you’ll do is disappoint yourself in the end. You don’t need that. As long as you make yourself proud, you’ll always be happy.

4.停止取悦他人，开始欣赏自我。你不可能总是使所有人都高兴。因此停止这类的尝试吧，因为你这样所做的一切最终会使你自我否定。你不需要如此。只要你让自己自豪起来，你就会总是快乐的。

When you feel unhappy with something in your life, make a change to ease that unhappiness. If you feel guilty about something, do what you feel guilty about so you don’t feel guilty anymore. As long as you learn to listen to your inner self, you’ll be giving yourself what you need and making yourself happy.

5.当你对人生中的某些事情感到不高兴时，做出一些改变以释放那些烦恼。如果你为一些事情感到内疚，去做那些会使你不再感觉内疚的事情。只要你学会倾听内在的自我，你将会给予自我你所需并使感受到快乐。

Your Life Needs a Leader

你的人生需要领导者

The reason why it seems as though your life is so out of control is that it doesn’t have a leader. Lead your life starting now.

你的人生总是失去控制的原因在于你没有一位领导者。从现在开始引导你的人生吧。

You’ll start to see how much better it feels to be in control of what happens every day. How much more you can get done. How good it feels not to feel like the world is fighting against you.

你会开始看到当每天发生的事情都处于控制之中时的感觉是多么美好。更何况你可以做到。当发现世界不再与你为敌时的那种感觉是如此之好。

It’s time to step out of misery and into happiness. You deserve this after everything you’ve been through.

现在是时候摆脱痛苦并享受快乐了。当你经历了一切后这都是你应得的。